Happy Birthday to me!
I know birthdays are special... A day like no other.
THE day you were born! A time to celebrate!
For me, it really IS just another day. Mostly I work, IF my birthday happens to fall on a work day. If it's not a work day, I may start by sleeping in a bit, but then I still work at home. This year, my work is as "unpaid" caregiver, for my hubby... I have always seemed to have an endless supply of tasks to do & I multi-task very well, if I do say so myself!
I always think of where I was born. My parents are missionaries, so I was born in a foreign country. Mom has always told the story of me being ignored in the hospital, due to medical emergencies of others, which caused me to lose my voice, crying so much. When they brought me home from the hospital, I had no voice left, so mom had to keep looking in on me, to see if I was silently crying... I guess you could say, I learned early on (at birth, basically) that it wasn't all about me. I always tend to put others first. I live to serve.
I can remember having some fun little birthday parties when I was a girl. A few friends over, paper hats, cake & the "Happy Birthday" song. As I got older, the birthdays turned into slumber parties, with friends spending the night & trying to see if we could stay up all night. Hopefully you weren't the first one asleep, or you could end up with toothpaste squirted into your mouth, or baby powder sprinkled in your hair as you slept. Oh the joys!! It was so much fun to be so silly, wasn't it!? ;)
I got married fairly early on in my life. I was seventeen. My hubby loved me SO much, he ALWAYS wanted to make a huge deal about me for my birthday. If he knew it was coming up in a week, he'd always say, "Let's go get a cake for your birthday next week!", so we could eat it all week long. THEN he'd want to get me another cake on my birthday! Silly man!!
As we grew older, we tried not to make such a huge deal over our birthdays. Me especially. I never expected a bunch of gifts & have always been happy with a hug & time spent together, no matter where it was... My absolute favorite thing was working in my flowerbeds & planters, so my hubby would take me to a nearby nursery & let me load up on plants. I'd come out with a few flats of flowers & he'd take me home, set up his halogen garage light at the corner of the house & shine it down into our big flowerbed at the end of the house, because he knew how happy it would make me. I'd stay out there until the wee hours of the morning, working away, planting flowers & trimming off dead flowers on the existing plants. I loved flowers & beautifying our space more than doing anything else. My hubby would always bring me out my favorite drink & make me take a break, to eat dinner that he made especially for me. Usually something he knew I loved, like our homemade tacos. He is SUPER sweet!!... I love looking back at pictures of those beds & flowers I worked SO hard on...
THOSE are my most savored birthday times.
This year, things are a bit different, but we can celebrate none-the-less... My hubby had his stroke four & a half months ago & still needs my full-time care. He is gaining a bit of strength every day. Baby steps... The best gift for me would be if he miraculously gained back his whole self, this very day... However, I will still celebrate the fact that I was able to get him into a "regular" lounge chair on the back deck, where he sun-roasted himself for an hour while I sat with a cup of coffee & read birthday wishes from awesome people on my Facebook page, knowing full well I should use that time to straighten up in the house & clean the toilets or something... AND I was able to get him back up out of that lounge chair by myself, with ease. Thank God for gait belts, eh!...
After I cut up & served him his lunch, we spent most of the rest of the day with my hubby doing his OT & PT exercises. Then I got him set up out on the back deck, while I deadheaded some flowers out in the flowerbed & played with our dog, Gypsy in the grass. That's where we were when my sister's hubby showed up with a bunch of fixin's for a birthday BBQ in a couple of days, so I spent some time prepping the meats & getting them in their marinades & finding space in the garage fridge where they could soak up their flavors for a couple of nights. We love to BBQ, so look forward to it.
I re-heated leftovers for dinner. I cut up my hubby's meats & served his food on a tray at the end of our bed. Once he was done eating, I re-heated myself a leftover baked potato & splurged on a sundae cone as my birthday dessert. It was yummy.
Later, when my hubby had had enough of his stench (he thinks he stinks, but truly he smells fine most times), I got him undressed & onto the shower bench for a good scrubbing... & After I squeezed a dollop of shampoo onto his head & he smeared it around with his left hand, I soaped up his washcloth... & As I was lovingly lifting up each arm to wash it & lathering up his armpits, I found myself thinking, "What a gift". I still have my hubby after him having multiple strokes. He may not be able to walk good yet or have the use of his right arm & hand "yet", but he can still talk. Plus, even though he can't always think of the exact things he wants to say he can still communicate with us. He is working SUPER HARD at gaining back his ability to do things & even though it takes time, we have time... He's a gift! He was my gift when I met him & he is my gift today, on my birthday...
Am I DOG-tired? YES!!...
Do I miss our old life? YES!!... Are we flat broke? We're living on faith & donations... Am I happy that I still have my hubby? ABSOLUTELY!!... Am I willing to be there for him, every single day, whenever he needs me? You bet I am!! Through thick & thin... I'm happy any day that I wake up breathin'!
So, if you're asking did I have a good birthday, the answer is... Yes, but not for any of the reasons anyone would think. My birthday wasn't anyone's typical birthday, but it was "my" day & I spent it caring for the love of my life, in the best ways possible... Happy Birthday to me!
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